~Morning early birds~
My mind was disturbed when I woke up this morning. I had a bad dream. It’s hard to tell but it’s true. I still feel the pain after all this time. Maybe I’ve forgive but I’ve not forget. I have to get things back to track. Before I went to bed last night, I told myself to focus on what matters. My 2nd paper “Selection Design” is just around the corner. I need to get myself prepared for the war but somehow I just lost my track and my mind is not in the right mode. How life will be much easier if there is a “button” to click to change our mode. Damn it!! I need to get out of this place.
So many things happened this few weeks. I do not know how and who to tell. Maybe blogging is the only way that I can be true and transparent to myself. No hiding in this place. It’s not because I don’t have any friends to tell, but somehow those that I can count on are not in the same part of the world as me except her. *sigh*.I was shocked and sad when I heard the person that I care and love hurt by this thing called “Love is blind”. I tears me up inside to him treated you this way. You used to tell me to be strong and bold when making decision. But do you? If it hurts then why do you still hang on the relationship? I wish I can save you. You told me how much you would love me if there is no “if” between us. Maybe the only reason we can’t be together is because we don’t want to hurt other peoples feeling. But is it worth it my dear? Maybe if we were brave enough, we’ll find the happiness that we are looking for. I know I can’t push things too hard, not because I don’t want to, but because I can’t. I know how much you love the relationship and I don’t want to be just another jerk that broke it. I’m not that kind of person. I rather wait. If it takes you forever to realize, then I’ll wait. For the time being, I’ll have to walk away. Hope this can ease the pain that we both feel. But dear, I miss you so much*sigh*.huh. It’s enough all the love things for this time. Need to get my head clear. (Take a DEEP breath)
My mind was disturbed when I woke up this morning. I had a bad dream. It’s hard to tell but it’s true. I still feel the pain after all this time. Maybe I’ve forgive but I’ve not forget. I have to get things back to track. Before I went to bed last night, I told myself to focus on what matters. My 2nd paper “Selection Design” is just around the corner. I need to get myself prepared for the war but somehow I just lost my track and my mind is not in the right mode. How life will be much easier if there is a “button” to click to change our mode. Damn it!! I need to get out of this place.
So many things happened this few weeks. I do not know how and who to tell. Maybe blogging is the only way that I can be true and transparent to myself. No hiding in this place. It’s not because I don’t have any friends to tell, but somehow those that I can count on are not in the same part of the world as me except her. *sigh*.I was shocked and sad when I heard the person that I care and love hurt by this thing called “Love is blind”. I tears me up inside to him treated you this way. You used to tell me to be strong and bold when making decision. But do you? If it hurts then why do you still hang on the relationship? I wish I can save you. You told me how much you would love me if there is no “if” between us. Maybe the only reason we can’t be together is because we don’t want to hurt other peoples feeling. But is it worth it my dear? Maybe if we were brave enough, we’ll find the happiness that we are looking for. I know I can’t push things too hard, not because I don’t want to, but because I can’t. I know how much you love the relationship and I don’t want to be just another jerk that broke it. I’m not that kind of person. I rather wait. If it takes you forever to realize, then I’ll wait. For the time being, I’ll have to walk away. Hope this can ease the pain that we both feel. But dear, I miss you so much*sigh*.huh. It’s enough all the love things for this time. Need to get my head clear. (Take a DEEP breath)
Last night I watched this film “SEPI” recommended by my friends. I’m not that love story fanatic fans but somehow it managed to get me into the story. I was caught with this quote: "untuk apa bertemu kalau hanya untuk berpisah" (Translation: why do we meet if we were not meant to be together) I personally think this movie is one of the best drama produced by Malaysian film industry. It has what it takes to be in same class as “a walk to remember", "notebook", "Cinta" and "love". The script was fabulous and I love the sequence. I rated it as 4/5. Compliments for all the cast as well as the directors and his crews. You guys rock!! Hope to see more from you guys.
That's all from me today. Last words from me, " Sometimes it takes what's broken to become whole again" -chad-
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